Internet Relay Story – I
EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL-TIME. 09:56 [Users #kit-room] 09:56 [@ChanServ] [ kitalis_] [ kitallis] 09:56 --> #kit-room: Total of 2 nicks (1 ops, 0 halfops, 0 voices, 1 normal) 09:57 --> kitallis (n=kitallis@343.345.232.27) has joined #kit-room 09:59 kitallis : *Yawn* 10:00 kitallis : Darn. It's 10 P.M. already. Better finish my work off 10:00 kitallis : or I'll have to face KCs sad breath tommorow morning. 10:02 ! kitallis snaps out his Dell, starts working 10:03 ! kitallis goes and grabs a can of b33r 10:03 kitallis : Hmm, LaTeX is giving me the creeps 10:04 kitallis : might as well make this in PowerPoint. 10:06 kitallis : *Sigh* 10:06 kitallis : I'm a fucking programmer, why do I even need to make this shite :S 10:06 kitallis : I'd rather ... ohh, what's this ... hmm, p0rn ... naaaicee. 10:07 kitallis : These clothes are rather uncomfortable 10:07 kitallis : I should change to something comfortable first. 10:08 ! kitallis opens his wardrobe, grabs some pyjamas. 10:08 ! kitallis sees something glimmering in the dark corridor 10:08 kitallis : Hmm, that was odd. I swear I saw two white round balls shining 10:08 kitallis : over there. Probably cuz of this stupid little b33r 10:10 kitallis : Argh, WTH. Shouldn't waste time. I'm so pumped already. 10:11 ! kitallis turns the music on 10:11 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 10:12 kitallis : Ahhh, /me feel so trippy. 10:12 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 10:13 kitallis : This is so nice ... 10:13 kitallis : so where was I ... 10:13 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 10:14 ! kitallis does a Control+Shift+P 10:14 kitallis : naicce, fuck work, living alone is awesome ... 10:14 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 10:16 kitallis : Shit, need moar b33r. 10:16 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 10:16 ! kitallis stands up, minimizing the browser, turns around ... 10:17 sid0 : <_< 10:17 ! kitallis drops the empty can in his hands 10:18 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG. 10:18 kitallis : ... 10:18 kitallis : ... 10:18 sid0 : <_< 10:18 kitallis : ... 10:19 sid0 : <_< 10:19 kitallis : ... 10:19 ! kitallis quietly goes around him and leaves the room 10:20 kitallis : ... 10:19 sid0 : <_< 10:19 kitallis : ... 10:19 sid0 : @_@ 10:19 kitallis : ... 10:20 sid0 : >_> 10:20 --> kitallis (n=kitallis@343.345.232.27) has left #kit-room () 10:20 ! kitallis calls m1k3y 10:20 kitallis : m1k3y: dude, you won't fucking believe what happened just now 10:21 kitallis : m1k3y: can't even begin to explain you ... 10:21 m1k3y : kitallis, bhut 10:21 ! kitallis starts running 10:21 kitallis : m1k3y: well, nvm, I'll explain later 10:21 kitallis : m1k3y: can I just sleep over at your house, for tonight? 10:22 m1k3y : kitallis, shyoar 10:23 kitallis : ... 10:23 kitallis : Can't think. Gotta think. Not right. Rite. Right. 10:23 kitallis : Something is wrong. Wrong. Lights. Something is wrong. 10:23 kitallis : Probably the b33r. No, I'm good. You're good. We. Us. 10:23 kitallis : Gotta run. Fast. Something was wrong. 10:24 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 10:24 kitallis : ... 10:24 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 10:24 kitallis : What's happening. Run. Big strides. Alcohol. No. Fast. 10:25 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 10:25 kitallis : ... 10:27 ! kitallis rings m1k3y's doorbell 10:27 kitallis : ... 10:27 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 10:27 kitallis : Need to get this music outta my mind. Need to. Now. 10:28 m1k3y : haye kitallis 10:28 m1k3y : kitallis, Dude, you look drunk 10:28 kitallis : m1k3y: sorta, just a little b33r, wasn't feeling right over there. 10:29 m1k3y : kitallis, oya, iy understand, cum on in. 09:29 [Users #m1k3y-room] 09:29 [@ChanServ] [ m1k3y] [ prostitute] 09:29 --> #m1k3y-room: Total of 2 nicks (1 ops, 0 halfops, 0 voices, 1 normal) 10:29 --> kitallis (n=kitallis@343.345.232.27) has joined #m1k3y-room 10:29 kitallis : m1k3y: KTHX 10:29 kitallis : m1k3y: Dude, I should sleep now, very tired. 10:30 m1k3y : kitallis, :S 10:30 m1k3y : kitallis, err... k 10:30 m1k3y : kitallis: we'll tawk in tah mornin' 10:31 kitallis : m1k3y: thx, for all this 10:31 m1k3y : kitallis: np, d00d. 10:32 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 10:33 kitallis : Must go to sleep. Right fucking now. 10:34 ! kitallis lies on the bed, grabs the blanket 10:34 kitallis : Hmm. Teddy Bear. Tomatoes. Cold. Need to sleep 10:34 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 10:35 ! kitallis turns the lights off, dissolves into a sleeping shape 10:36 kitallis : I'm not sure why it came 10:36 kitallis : It just stood. I wasn't ready. 10:37 kitallis : I swear I wanted to shout 10:37 kitallis : But for some reason I didn't. 10:37 kitallis : I don't think I'll be able to sleep this way. 10:39 ! kitallis turns around to check the time on m1k3y's Bose clock 10:39 kitallis : 10:41 it says. Ain't even mid-night yet. 10:39 kitallis : Gotta try sleeping in any case. 10:40 sid0 : >_> 10:40 ! kitallis wiggles his head 10:40 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 10:41 sid0 : >_> 10:41 kitallis : ... 10:41 sid0 : >_> 10:41 kitallis : HOLY FUCKING GAWD, HE'S BLOODY HERE AGAIN. 10:41 kitallis : LEAVE ME FUCKING ALONE, YOU S.O.B. 10:42 sid0 : >_> 10:43 ! kitallis storms out of the room 10:43 m1k3y : kitallis: wut happened? 10:43 --> kitallis (n=kitallis@343.345.232.27) has left #m1k3y-room () 10:44 m1k3y : ... 10:45 kitallis : Why is this happening. Why is it there. 10:47 kitallis : I gotta run. Gotta find a loophole 10:47 kitallis : Need to get rid of him 10:49 kitallis : There should be a way. There always is. 10:50 kitallis : Need to find something to get sober first. 10:50 kitallis : Can't think this way. Chemist. Adrenaline shot. Need one. 10:50 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 10:52 ! kitallis crosses the road, runs over to the Chemist 10:53 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 10:53 kitallis : Can I get some Epinephrine shots? 10:53 ChemGuy : are you god? 10:53 kitallis : No :S 10:53 ChemGuy : sucks duzunnit? 10:53 kitallis : not really. 10:53 ChemGuy : wife? kids? 10:54 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 10:54 kitallis : No 10:54 ChemGuy : single lol 10:54 kitallis : yaahh /0/ 10:54 kitallis : Just gimme the meds already. 10:54 ChemGuy : kk 10:58 ! kitallis injects some Adrenaline 10:59 kitallis : There must be some place it can't enter. 10:59 kitallis : Why is it doing this to me. 10:59 ! kitallis spits twice in a gap of three seconds, then spits again. 11:00 kitallis : Hmm, this is making me feel so alive 11:00 kitallis : I should just fucking run away as far as I can 11:02 ! kitallis starts leaping into the infinite road ahead. 11:03 kitallis : ... 11:03 kitallis : ... 11:03 kitallis : Truck. 11:04 ! kitallis slams into the speeding truck 11:04 kitallis : ... 11:03 TruckDriver : HOLY SHIT. CALL THE AMBULANCE. FUCKING CALL THE HOSPITAL! 11:04 SomeGuy : WTF happened! 11:04 AnotherGuy : Dear god... 11:05 TruckDriver : Somebody get a fucking ambulance!! 11:05 TruckDriver : He was fucking running like maniac in the middle of the street 11:05 TruckDriver : in the opposite fucking direction, slammed straight into me 11:05 AnotherGuy : Dear god... 11:06 ChanServ : *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* ; *DHUGH DHUG CHAGHK* 11:06 kitallis : bhut ha...ppened... 11:06 TruckDriver : OMG he's waking up!! ...try relaxing kid. 11:06 AnotherGuy : Dear god... 11:07 SomeGuy : They're here, the ambulance is here! 11:07 Medic : Get him in! Get him in! Go! Go! GO! 11:07 AnotherGuy : Dear god... 11:08 kitallis : wha ... 11:08 kitallis : mhmmmhmm ... 11:08 AnotherGuy : Dear god... 11:09 kitallis : AnotherGuy: stfu n00b. 11:09 AnotherGuy : kk 11:10 SomeGuy : I Think he'll be alright 11:10 TruckDriver : You never know. You never do. 11:58 ! kitallis wakes up, in the hospital, drowsy 11:58 kitallis : Plaster. Bandage. Blood. Peace. 11:58 ! kitallis looks around. 11:58 kitallis : I think it's over. 11:58 kitallis : He was just a fragment of my pervert imagination, I guess 11:58 ! kitallis closes his eyes for a while 11:59 ! kitallis looks around again. 11:59 kitallis : Yep. It's over. 11:59 ! kitallis does a shut-eye and goes back to sleep. 12:00 sid0 : <_<
Obligatory blog post. An intended mockery on the deeds of the great sid0. He’s watching.
